Who am I?

Where do I start? It’s always tricky starting anything I guess so this beginning may be a little waffley

Who am I?

Born on 18thDecember 1957 Erica Jane Morgan (nee Twist…which is very relevant) Erica after my lovely Dad…I was supposed to be Jane Erica but when he went to register me he thought Erica Jane sounded better – and I’m inclined to agree. 

Obviously I wasn’t known as Erica that would have been too confusing we already had Big Eric and Little Eric in the Twist family, little did I know the confusion would be short-lived as on 3rdJuly 1968 my young happy life (and my mums) was turned upside down when my Dad went to play golf in a competition for his club to Lymm Golf club and had a sudden and fatal heart attack on the 7th . I have since learnt he did have a GP (or maybe 2? History does make these “facts” less factual) in the 4 –ball who worked on him until the ambulance arrived. I don’t really know when he lost his fight but I do remember being told a small clot smaller than your fingernail was what had killed him. I was – and still am – heartbroken.

I think he knew it may happen…he had bought the grave plot next to his sister Eunice who had had her fatal heart attack 5 years previously. My Aunty “Noo niss”, my godmother, so close to her little brother that she called her youngest son Eric after him. I remember clearly driving home from school with my mum and dad and as we approached Winwick (on our way home) I insisted I wanted to see her. As my parents were happy to visit, we “popped in” only to learn Eunice had come home from school (she was a teacher) early and didn’t feel good so had gone to bed. I bounced upstairs and sat on the bed chatting to her. The next morning, we had a call to say she had died in the night, a sudden and fatal heart attack… she was 42.

My dad was devastated, my mum was unnerved when he took photos of the grave after the funeral …. there were so many flowers…everyone was in shock. He also secured the plot for himself and my mum in the future.

It didn’t end there… when I was 16 my Uncle Alan (dads brother and best friend and very much my surrogate Dad after my own Dad died) had a heart attack, luckily he survived he was 44. I was in my 1styear at university when I got the call to say my Aunty Dorothy had been in the bathroom getting ready for work when she collapsed and died of yes a sudden and fatal heart attack. She was 47. In my early 20’s Aunty Joan (the youngest of that generation of the Twist family) had her Heart attack she was 48, this time she survived…she eventually had the fatal heart attack at 69.

As a young adult I realized this was not “normal” and felt a Sword of Damacles hung over the family, and obviously myself, something which haunted me for 50 years until on 21stOctober 2017 I was finally diagnosed with severe coronary heart disease with the LAD so blocked I was a heart attack waiting to happen… Thank God for Dr Annice Mukherjee who was very suspicious of my symptoms and insisted I get a second opinion ( It will become apparent why a second opinion later) and referred me to Dr Neil Davidson who although I “wasn’t the profile” thought a CT angiogram would clear any doubts… My Guardian Angels, of which there are too many, were certainly looking out for me.

 

I am just over 12 months down the line from when the diagnosis started to snowball.

I have issues.

I don’t feel like it has happened to me

I feel I have been watching a movie of someone else’s life

I am a very lucky girl

I have been going to start my blog since the night before my life saving surgery.

I told Ryan Giggs this on Day 3…that’s another story…

I have written notes and diaries and made short videos and taken pictures.

I have not known how to start

 

Today, 14 November 2018, my counsellor said “write your blog this week, and we can assess the change, you will be able to see how far you have come”

 So, I’ve started it and already feel proud but it’s taken me til now – 18thDecember 2018 – my birthday – to put it on my website/blog …created to help me share my story by the fabulous team at Morgan Branding (my Middle sons business – proud mummy moment).